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Pretend danger? I don't even know her! 
Just another day on the balcony of life 
Going viral on the Internet is no match for real life danger 
Looks like I'm in trouble again 
When your online fame can't save you 
Who knew real life was so dangerous? 
When the white t-shirt and mustache don't protect you 
When your social media followers don't save you 
This isn't what I expected! 
When your Internet fame doesn't prepare you for reality 
Time to face the music 
What did I get myself into?! 
Oh no, not again! 
You can't talk your way out of danger 
The moment you realize your social media virality isn't real 
What's the point of going viral if it doesn't protect you? 
I should have seen this coming! 
When you realize your online fame isn't real life 
When you think you're ready for the world, but you're not 
When you realize your online persona won't protect you 
Is this really happening? 
Here we go again... 
I'm not sure I'm ready for this! 
What have I done to deserve this? 
When your online bravado fails you 
Just another day of standing up for yourself 
A happy and eager smile won't save you